A true disappointment today was, as I woke up on the lovely morning of December 25th, 2007…or as the majority of us like to call it, Christmas Day. I began my normal routine, a shower, and shave. Then I went to check on the Christmas tree and finally off to the computer to check all 53 email accounts I have for various websites I run. I expected no business mail what’s so ever, but to my dismay I also had no junk mail.
Now on this day I expect all the local stores to be closed and not to be able to get much done, but since when is SPAM able to have the day off? I want to know if the people behind these messages actually have paid holidays and vacation time. If there is one thing I thought I could count on is to receive in the upwards of 50 emails a day telling me how I can take my hog to another level with pills that will give me an additional 3”. I was wrong though, Outlook locked up on me and there it all was waiting for me to delete it, all 48 emails.
So needless to say on Christmas I won 6 international lotto’s, had 3 account suspensions on Paypal (another 2 on eBay), found out my man tool was a bit small and needs enhancement, received several opinions from strangers that my love life could be better, and I am just waiting on the last few of the day that insist I should support a Nigerian boy and his three donkeys. Obviously this is not a revelation or anything but I was expecting a slowdown of some sort. Where are the guys to create the Spammer’s Global Guild of Writers?
I wish they could somehow come together, which I am sure they would probably be able to get a federal grant to assist them. Once the SPGGW is formed we would just wait for the inevitable strike to happen. These guys need a Union of something, not like Hoffa’s though. They seem like they are working around the clock sending poorly written emails with vast grammatical errors in them. The least us tax payers could do is send them to a couple English classes at a community college. I feel sorry for them frankly, and I think it’s time something is done besides another congressional hearing.
Anyways, I hate SPAM, and I hate those 11 year old Chinese Immigrants or Russian sex slaves that are paid thousands of dollars to deliver SPAM to my mailbox. Instead of sending me a link to the next webcam, just send me a summary of what I will see and a few jpgs of it. I just don’t have time for all the porn links so I need cliff notes. To all you spammers out there, my hat goes off to you, but you have a long road ahead to be successful or to at least lure me to rapid tab Canadian generic Viagra starter sets.
